Dear sweet Audi,
I see you…
I see you making your way through the trenches of parenting. And you’re doing a good job.
You had one deep, dark spiraling moment this week and it took everything in you to not react like you used to. Harsh self-criticism is your old way of being. And your reaction to this particular hard moment proves you are changing.
I want you to see it too and celebrate it!
Yes, bedtime went very, very badly. I know how you felt like the worst parent on the face of the planet. Like seriously… Wondering how God could place these three beautiful, tender children in your care… But once you got past the onslaught of lies and self-criticism…
I saw resilience.
I saw tender strength.
Instead of wallowing in shame and guilt and going to bed ever-so-slightly depressed, you did the things you knew would bring you back to center. Back to life. You took a deep breath, lit a candle and prayed. You sat in silence and asked Jesus how He saw you in that moment.
And seeing yourself how He sees you… changes everything.
You took the stance of forgiveness and being on your own team. You saw yourself through the eyes of compassion rather than judgement.
Parenting is hard. It’s not for the faint of heart.
Besides, what parent doesn’t occasionally have the loose thought of selling their children to the gypsies?
Sit in the truth that God is increasing your resiliency, strength and gentle compassion towards yourself.
Always, always tenderly FOR you,